Have you appreciated your clitoris lately?

First, masturbation is its own unique and important sexual outlet, not just a stand-in for sex.

First, masturbation is its own unique and important sexual outlet, not just a stand-in for sex.

"Too often, masturbation is relegated to a second-class citizenship," Patti Britton, PhD, sexologist and founder of Sex Coach U, tells BuzzFeed Health. "It really should be regarded as first class. It’s not a step down and it’s not an add-on, either. It’s a lifelong relationship you have with your body and with your own sexuality."

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Making the ultimate goal of masturbation an orgasm might be giving you performance anxiety.

Making the ultimate goal of masturbation an orgasm might be giving you performance anxiety.

Sometimes you want an orgasm, know exactly how to get it, and knock it out of the way. Which, great. But if you have trouble orgasming, you might actually be trying too hard to get yourself off, says Britton. In that case, move away from goal-centered masturbation to take the pressure off and just focus on pleasuring yourself without worrying about whether or not you get off.

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Figuring out how to get yourself off without a toy first is a great way to set a foundation before experimenting more with different kinds of orgasms.

Figuring out how to get yourself off without a toy first is a great way to set a foundation before experimenting more with different kinds of orgasms.

Orgasms from vibrators = great. But if you're someone who doesn't have any medical issues making your clitoris less sensitive (we'll get to that in a bit), getting to know your body without a toy can be informative and lead to orgasms you didn't know you could have. "Learn your baseline, and then you can go wild," says Britton.

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The main reason people with vaginas have trouble orgasming is because they're not utilizing the clitoris.

The main reason people with vaginas have trouble orgasming is because they're not utilizing the clitoris.

Everyone's body is different, for sure, but it is FAR more common to orgasm through stimulation of the clitoris than through penetration. "For many people, getting a vibrator and instructions on how to do clitoral stimulation is all they need to achieve orgasm," Dr. Lauren Streicher, board-certified gynecologist and author of Sex Rx, tells BuzzFeed Health. "The number one reason women who have never orgasmed haven’t yet is because they have an expectation that it’s going to happen with intercourse."

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